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Post by modeski on May 11, 2005 21:41:41 GMT
Today May 11th is the 4th anniversary of the death of Douglas Adams. I know of at least two other huge fans on this board (hello Havet and Nas), so I thought it would be fitting to honour his memory with a game of Meaning of Liff.
I'll start off:
Barton Upon Humber (n.)
The sense of wretched anticipation that precedes the pain-filled agony of diarrohea. Usually manifests most strongly after one to two hours on the lavatory.
Droitwich Spa (n.)
A disused public lavatory which has been commandeered by errant winos.
Wibtoft (adv.)
Descriptive of the fine, cilia-like hairs that adorn the outside of middle-aged men's ears.
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Post by ringmasterrob on May 12, 2005 6:55:35 GMT
Would you mind giving a brief description of the rules and how we play, for those of us who don't know already?  |
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Post by modeski on May 12, 2005 8:14:58 GMT
No problem at all As the authors put it: there are hundreds of common experiences, feelings, situations and even objects which we all know and recognize, but for which no word exists. On the other hand, the world is littered with thousands of spare words doing nothing but loafing about on signposts pointing at places. That's the general idea - take place names and apply them to feelings/situations/objects etc that don't have one. And try to do it in a humorous way.  |
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Post by HStorm on May 15, 2005 10:10:51 GMT
*Sigh* Every time I've tried to play this against you recently you've got annoyed, Mod! Ah well... Wythenshawe v.To make a formidable macho show of not being hurt in a fight, then walking away and bursting into tears as soon as you get round the corner. Houstoun n.A Texan who doesn't vote Republican. The term has fallen into disuse. Plymouth n.Some big-mouthed Scotsman who refuses to play a wordgame you like until he suggests it first.  |
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Post by modeski on May 16, 2005 14:22:32 GMT
Inverbervie (n.)
A particular genus of handsome Scotsman, who adopts a fickle attitude to word games.
Letchworth (adj.)
A term mostly used by misogynists, describing the attractiveness of passing females.
Phwoar, that bit of fluff is definitely letchworth!
Birchover (n.)
A self-flagellation technique favoured by cabinet ministers.
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Post by HStorm on May 16, 2005 17:45:17 GMT
Irlams O' Th'Height n.
The feeling of giddy dread that sets in while not quite drunk, when you are still conscious of how stupidly you're behaving/about to behave, but have lost all power of self-restraint and therefore can't stop yourself.
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Post by modeski on May 16, 2005 19:43:29 GMT
Irlams O' Th'Height n.The feeling of giddy dread that sets in while not quite drunk, when you are still conscious of how stupidly you're behaving/about to behave, but have lost all power of self-restraint and therefore can't stop yourself. This quote defines a fair number of years of my life. |
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Post by HStorm on May 31, 2005 16:22:29 GMT
Bletchley Park n.
A condom worn on the fingers for what is optimistically presumed to be humorous effect.
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Post by ringmasterrob on Jun 5, 2005 20:44:45 GMT
Sutton Coldfield adj.
An expletive yelled by an angry husband/wife whose other half has locked themselves in the family car in extremely cold weather, miles from the nearest shelter.
“Let me in! It’s Sutton Coldfield out here!”
(Apologies if it sucks, I'm new to the game!)
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Post by HStorm on Jun 5, 2005 20:47:41 GMT
Nantucket nAny individual playing The Meaning Of Liff who can't tell the difference between a noun and an adjective... 
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Post by ringmasterrob on Jun 6, 2005 10:27:53 GMT
Pratt's Bottom n.A rather dull individual who insists on pointing out simple mistakes made in games
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Post by modeski on Jun 7, 2005 16:54:30 GMT
Bognor Regis (n.)
A middle-aged gentleman who frequents public lavatories in search of forbidden pleasures. George Michael is a well-known Bognor Regis.
Gretna Green(n.)
A mysterious fungus which one discovers on the tongue, after a drinking binge of indeterminate length.
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Post by HStorm on Jun 10, 2005 17:48:24 GMT
Dawlish Warren n.
An irrational and variantisable number recently developed in the field of mathematics, defining a required speed level for traffic and varying according to circumstances. The Dawlish Warren is the optimum pacing of traffic on a busy main road for making sure that the time that all cars passing in one direction have gone coincides precisely with the arrival of a massive backlog of cars heading the other way, thus making sure that pedestrians are incapable of crossing.
The Dawlish Warren velocity is now the speed that car drivers are required by law to travel at in all industrial areas of Greater Manchester and Merseyside.
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Post by HStorm on Jun 13, 2005 15:55:50 GMT
Farley Wallop n.
A man who attempts to comfort one who has been diagnosed clinically obese by telling fat jokes, or one who has had a leg amputated by telling jokes about Long John Silver.
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Post by Naselus on Jul 19, 2005 10:59:03 GMT
Ashton (n)- The warm feeling left by someone else's buttocks on a recently vacated lavatory seat.
Ashton under Lyne (v)- The realisation that you are actually rather enjoying an ashton.
Ashton in Furness (n) - One who, after repeated Ashton Under Lynes, becomes dependant on Ashtons in order to succeed in using the toilet.
Ashton on Humber (n) - The peculiar sighing sound that an Ashton in Furness will give, signalling the successful commandeering of an Ashton.
Ashton on Tyne. (v) - The vague discomfort felt by someone enduring an Ashton in a cubical next to an Ashton in Furness when he hears the Ashton on Humber.
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Post by Naselus on Sept 26, 2005 16:29:17 GMT
Melbourne (n) One who practices videotape archaeology, whereby items are recorded more for the enjoyment of looking at the actors haircuts in the future than for the value of the actual programming. American soaps are particularly prized by Melbournes.
Adelaide (n) The woman you don't remember meeting who's currently asleep on your arm.
Sydney (n) The phone numbers added to a mobile phone during a drunken night out, with names such as 'Atch Rlie' and 'Pidlson'.
Calais (n) A really good French actor. The term has fallen into disuse.
Clavisham (v) To attempt to personally befriend every person in the country as a means of avioding jury duty.
Rio De Janiro (n) The scale by which the campness of South American banknotes can be measured.
Dublin (legal n) The Dublin is a government-set percentage of any cleaning company's workforce that must be small round Irish women over the age of sixty. It currently stands at 85%.
Kilby (n) Archaic game, by which contestants continue to drink at parties after everyone else has left and all the alcohol worth consuming has gone. The first player to be taken to hospital, and thus leave the party without having to pay for a taxi, wins.
Skegness (v) The quarter-inch of scum at the bottom of a can of bitter. Skegness is much sought but those who practice Kilby(q.v).
Scun thorpe (n) the cigarette ends that are vital in the production of good Skegness (q.v.).
Hackney (v) To be angered by people who don't split Kit-Kats lengthways.
Sutherington (collective n) Those who spend the entire party in the kitchen.
Kensington (n) A man usually found in a Sutherington, who has chosen to venture out into the party, only to discover it's not as good as he always feared. The Kensington will now find himself isolated from the Sutherington, and will have to spend the whole night talking to an accountant about the best way to cook parsnips.
Hartlepool (adj) Of good hats, to be unobtainable from any shops save one your friend won't tell you the address of.
Lexington Spa (n) Feelings of intense rage and frustration brought on by excessively difficult crossword clues.
Chigwell (n) Feelings of intense smugness and self-worth brought on by appalingly easy crossword clues.
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Post by Naselus on Sept 26, 2005 16:49:49 GMT
Atherton (v) Of girls who claim to be looking for 'Mr Right' to think he's most likely to be found in 'Mad Mike's Rapist Biker Bar'.
Naples (n) A barely concealed nipple in a movie that wants a 12 certificate.
Dunstable (n) a parking attendant who truly feels that he IS the law.
Throcking (vgr adj) Negative adjective used almost exclusively to describe the taste of danish beer.
Smythe (n) One who knows the names of all his ancestors, and actually regards this as a worthwhile achievement. Used as a job description by peers-in-waiting and It-girls.
Istanbull (v) Of employers to believe a tidy desk is indictative of hard work, rather than a sign of skiving off and wanting to look busy.
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Post by Naselus on Sept 26, 2005 17:33:52 GMT
Newquay (n) The embarrassing pet name your girlfriend insists you call her in front of your hardest mates.
Stoke (n) The act which seems such a good idea when you suggested it in the pub, but isn't quite so alluring now you're hanging from the motorway bridge wearing ladies underwear and a purple sarong.
Rotherham (n) The three-quarters of a cigarette you still have to smoke when your bus arrives.
Surrey (n) Technical term for the stuff in motorways service station sandwiches. Also an archaic French term for arsenic.
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Post by HStorm on Sept 26, 2005 18:00:52 GMT
Connaught (n) A hastily dreamt-up anti-Government conspiracy theory not worth the bother of dreaming up. The putative CIA/Mafia involvement in the JFK assassination is a conspiracy theory, the Government murder of the Downing Street pet cat, as dreamt up by Michael Howard in 1997, is merely a connaught theory.
Smithy Field (n) A self-worshipping family of Smythes (q.v.), who seem convinced that just being Smythes entitles them to go into neighbours' gardens and trim the hedges to the standards their ancestors would have wanted back when they owned the entire town.
Smithy Bridge (n) A long-suffering individual living in the flat above the home of a Smithy Field (q.v.). Smithy Bridges can be identified walking around in public because of the bags under their eyes and the nervous tic brought on by sleepless nights listening to the noise of drunken toasts to the ancestors and loud patriotic music from downstairs.
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Post by modeski on Sept 27, 2005 8:59:59 GMT
Weston Supermare (adj.)
Descriptive of the female presenters employed by various music channels. Waif-like, fake-tanned, with a strong regional or "sarf london" accent and limited intelligence.
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Post by Naselus on Sept 27, 2005 10:47:04 GMT
Runcorn (n) A meaningless but urgent-sounding portion of an instruction, found on torn bits of paper stuffed under your keyboard at the office. Runcorns include such terms as 'Immediately purge .thp files to prevent catastrophic' and 'Don't'.
Wilmington (n) someone who feels it's better to send twenty text mesages rather than have a 30 second conversation.
Billingham (n) The ferociously loyal servant hired by well-off families fallen on hard times, who's job is to do everything the rest of the staff used to do before they were fired.
Frankfurt (n) A pustulent boil worn on the nose, particularly favoured as a beauty mark in fourteenth century France.
Frankfort (myth n) A much-feared goblin, who was believed to run a small boil-lancing clinic outside Paris.
Grangemouth (n) Foul gum disease that effects sheep and Scotsmen.
Blackley (n) A game favoured by IT staff, where by you earn points depending on how long you can keep people waiting. The more important the person is to the company, the more points you score by not fixing their computer. Company chairmen and CEOs are worth no points.
Huddersfield (v) A particularly skilled move in a game of Blackley (q.v.), whereby an entire department's computers may be sabotaged in order to earn huge scores. Such acts include formatting servers, deleting profiles and setting fire to outlying buildings.
Heywood (n) The painful realisation that, despite your IT staff being a gang of Blackley (q.v.)-playing bastards, you've got to rely on them completely to sort out the latest Huddersfield (q.v.).
Woolsley (collective n) The assorted fluffy toy animals, stickers, children's photographs and pens that women pile on top of their computers at work after asking to have them taken away for repair.
Shaggerton (collective n) The correct term for a large group of Weston Supermarish women.
Alabama (v) To successfully fail to achieve an attempted crime. For exmaple, an Alabama'd attempt at shoplifting would be to succuessfully leave the shop with stolen goods, only to discover you left your wallet in the newspapers, or an Alabama'd burgalary would take place in a police station.
Altringham (n) The gentle breeze playing across your testicles that tells of a hole in your trousers.
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Post by HStorm on Sept 27, 2005 17:32:36 GMT
Cheadle Hulme (n) The fearful agony running up the cord of a testicle that is trapped in the hole that has allowed an Altrincham (q.v.).
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Post by Naselus on Sept 28, 2005 10:59:10 GMT
Cheadle (n) The soft yelping noise a man gives shortly before suffering Cheadle Hulme (q.v.)
Hulme (n) A particular type of wince men are genetically programmed to give upon recognising the significance of a Cheadle (q.v.)
Manchester (n) The inordinate pride felt by some men over having bodily hair.
Godmanchester (n) An unhealthy category of manchester (q.v.), specifically directed toward the fur that grows around the rectum.
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Post by Naselus on Sept 28, 2005 16:31:44 GMT
Basingstoke (n) The three small hairs that sprout from a male big toe. The purpose of these hairs has long been debated, but they are often cited as proof God must exist due to His obvious (bad) sense of humour.
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Post by HStorm on Sept 28, 2005 18:41:33 GMT
Levenshulme (n) The involuntary rush of tears accompanying a Hulme (q.v.) in response to a particularly loud and intense Cheadle (q.v.).
Great Tosson (n) A tome compiling all the lies of New Labour election manifestos since 1995. {Alt. def.} The hernia affliction inevitably experienced by any untrained individual attempting to lift same.
Little Tosson (n) A weedy little pamphlet compiling all the promises kept by New Labour from election manifestos since 1995. The term has never risen into active use.
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